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Thursday, July 13, 2006
11:56 PM

Birth order factor and your personality:
by Dr Kevin Leman

Discover how your personality is influenced by your position in the family


Only-borns
Positives: Only-borns are the mega-movers of the world. They are task-orientated; tend to be extremely well organised, highly conscientious and dependable. They are keen on facts, ideas and details and feel extremely comfortable with responsibility.
Negatives: The negative characteristics of only-borns can be tough to handle. They are often unforgiving, very demanding, hate to admit they're wrong and usually don't accept criticism well. To others, they seem very sensitive and indeed, their feelings are easily hurt.

First-borns
Positives: They are natural leaders and often high achievers. The majority of politicians, spokespersons and managing directors are first-borns. They frequently live with a sense of entitlement and even superiority. They often come in two flavours: compliant nurturers/caregivers or aggressive movers and shakers. Both are in control; they just use different methods. As a rule, first-borns are picky, precise people - they pay attention to detail - tend to be punctual, organised, and competent. They want to see things done right the first time. They don't like surprises.
Negatives: They are often moody and occasionally lack sensitivity. They can be intimidating, particularly by pushing people too hard or refusing to take no for an answer. Sometimes they can be a bit 'know-it-all', and often they are poor at delegating - largely because they don't trust other people as much as they trust themselves. They also tend to be bossy, perfectionists and overly-conscientious.

Middle-Borns
Positives: The classic middle-born is very relational, tends to be a people-pleaser and usually hates confrontation. Their basic need is to keep life smooth and their motto might be 'peace at any price'. They are usually very calm, will roll with the punches and are amiable, down-to-earth and great listeners. They are skilled at seeing both sides of a problem and eager to make everybody happy. That makes them good mediators and negotiators.
Negatives: They tend to be less driven than first-borns, but are much more eager to be liked - or at least be happy with them. They have a difficult time setting boundaries. They can drift into becoming 'co-dependent' as they try to please everybody. They are not good at making decisions that will offend others. They also tend to blame themselves when others fail.

Last-Borns
Positives: Last-borns are the world's cheerleaders. You have strong people skills and love to entertain and talk to others. You make friends easily and immediately make others feel at home. You're an extrovert, energised by the presence of other people and you're probably not afraid to take risks.
Negatives: Last-borns tend to get bored quickly. They have a strong fear of rejection and a short attention span. When the fun stops, they've had enough and want to check out. To some extent they're self-centred. They may harbour unrealistic expectations of finding a relationship that is always fun - and of course, such relationships simply do not last.